My Dearest Darling Readers, If you are reading this then I fear the worst has befallen me. As you know, when I first started this website, I was but a poor street urchin, begging for scraps and picking pockets also for scraps. I had such high hopes but since roastytoasty was established way back in 2007, it has not generated the revenue that I had promised my investors nor has it covered the number of fairly significant donations I contributed to many a government official. As such, I have had to supplement much of my income in the bustling trade of online silks and spices. This has brought me a great deal of riches and power and has put me in good stead with the Queen of Spain. However, due to a series of rather unfortunate oversights, it appears that I have inadvertently launched this website in what has turned out to be the online equivalent of "International Waters". Who knew that "www" stood for World Wide Web? I thought it had something to do with the wrestling... The short of it is, that this website has been boarded by pirates. I don't know exactly know how it happened, but here we are. I have been confined to my quarters with naught but a flagon of ale and a high speed internet connection. Upon landing, these dread pirates plan to demand a hefty ransom from the governor. Do not fear for me though, the Queen will pay and I shall see Spain once more. I may have lost my website and my fine silks and spices, and I may have caught a little scurvy and had many of my finest webmasters die by the sword, but I shall return with an armada and destroy all those who opposed me. Roastytoasty will once again sail these glittering shores, unfettered by insolent sea dogs, you have my word. I shall reclaim that which was taken from me. With strong winds, I estimate the pirates demise by the end of the month. But until then, they have free reign. My apologies if they cause any trouble. Yours sincerely, Dave

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